Sunday, April 11, 2010

Contrary to Popular Opinion, I CAN Refrain From Shopping . . .

. . . as you can plainly see from these photos I took yesterday.  It's Spring and that means the wild wisteria has taken over trees, bushes, fences -- just about anything everywhere EXCEPT anywhere on our five country acres.  Therefore, every Spring I drive around looking for it, usually forgetting that I left my camera at home.  Yesterday, I went out SPECIFICALLY on a wisteria hunt.  SPECIFICALLY.  That means the only thing I had on my mind was finding wisteria.  I'll have you know I passed up 21 yard sale signs (yes, I counted them), four advertised estate sales and the local street fair.  Well, it's not hard to pass up the street fair--they don't allow dogs and there are only so many Made In China birdhouses you can look at.  Plus I didn't volunteer to work at my antique mall again and if the owner saw me wandering around she MIGHT hold that against me . . .

I found wisteria entwined in a magnolia tree:

And wisteria in the process of choking an oak tree to death:

This poor tree is a fighter--it's about a quarter mile from the beach in Long Beach, MS, which means that it was hit by Hurricane Katrina's 35-40 foot tidal wave back in 2005, plus it's not only covered by wisteria vines but also what looks like kudzu or wild ivy.  Oh well, if you're gonna die . . . die pretty!  And about that tidal wave photo on the link: normally, the water off the Mississippi Gulf Coast is COMPLETELY flat.  No waves.  None.

Here's a closeup of the murderous wisteria, or as I like to refer to it, the "femme fatale" of the plant world:
 

After five years, you can once again ride the ferry to Ship Island off Gulfport, MS.  Ship Island has a crumbling Civil War fort, snakes and a few alligators.  Guess who refuses to go there?

Remember that tidal wave I mentioned?  We'll be darned if our bathrooms are gonna get knocked down again!  Unfortunately, if Granny is confined to a wheelchair she'd better have a catheter or at the very least a couple layers of Depends if she wants to enjoy a day at the beach  with the rest of the family . . .

Now, aren't you proud of me?

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!

11 comments:

  1. Ha ha ha!!

    Ah wisteria. I had one that would have grown right into my bathroom and wrapped itself around the toilet paper if I didn't have it chopped down.

    But they wait, hiding underground until the next spring, where they creep out again, sending their little fingers around everything, choking everything in their path...

    And you talk about not spending... Here I am watching another auction count down and getting that sick feeling in my stomach about buying it or not lol... *gulp*

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  2. My grandmother had an arbor covered in wisteria where she would drink tea and wear chiffon, so I'm nostalgic about it and always try to take pictures every spring. It was EVERYWHERE here yesterday when we were out, and, the camera didn't have the memory card in it. Sigh.

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  3. Love wisteria! I like the new name, "femme fatale" of the plant world! I do wonder how you passed up all those yard sales, but good for you, well I guess, if it made you happy for one day...you know? LOL....

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  4. OMG, you have me laughing so hard!

    I'm supposed to go to an antique show today with my mom, but the wind is blowing hard and it looks like rain...now I just have to convince her not to go...

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  5. I'm so proud of you! Maybe a few of the yard sales will still be open today. If you hurry, there might be some real deals. Just kidding! Stay home, drink coffee or something stronger and save your money. You may be a new condo owner soon and you'll have all kinds of buying to do. The wisteria is beautiful. We have some in full bloom here but it's confined to an arbor. Think I'll put some chiffon on and go drink some tea.

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  6. the battle of Wisteria. My neighbor planted it across their garage a few years ago. Every few weeks I go out and trim the side closest to my house so it won't grow up into my tree. Since I am up on a ladder I can see it growing into all the little cracks into their garage...a monster if you ask me! (but it is pretty). Can't believe you had such control to miss all those sales!

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  7. OH, you ARE a strong woman. A femme fatal in her own right!! I should perfect role model for me 8-)...

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  8. The willpower you have!! Good job on the photo assignment. Seems like a good way to keep you focused. I like the flora and am curious about the island now. Have a great day!

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  9. Wisteria is so pretty....we had on in our yard in Tyler, TX and I loved it as a child. Of course it's deadly....probably harbors hundreds of spiders! And, that's the biggest wave I've ever seen!

    Liz

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  10. I have planted wisteria along my porch it has climbed however, I am still waiting for blossoms.
    Please send wisteria bloom wishes my way.

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  11. I am most impressed! The yard sale signs are easy for me to by-pass, but Estate Sale signs will make me cause a wreck!

    It's funny you took photos of wisteria. I've been meaning to do that all weekend. Today, I noticed the purple is beginning to fade. Instead, the blooms look dirty gray!

    As for that bathroom, I'd wet my pants before I could climb all those steps! I would just have to pee in the ocean!

    Hope your weekend was fun!
    Anna

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